A brief analysis of how minor events turn into a big shemozzle:
A few days ago I was faced with a precarious situation at night, the burden of some disturbing events had got accumulated, one after the other; starting with the revival of a painful episode with a blood relation, a frozen shoulder, and itching attacks all over my body for last few nights were teasing. The most awkward part of this episode was that while I was almost tearing off my skin I had to constantly hide it from my wife who was already cross with me, thinking it to be the result of my eating spree with dry fruits. 🙃 She was also disturbed because her brother was to go for an angioplasty the next day. I got up at night to pay respects to my aged prostrate 😉!! As I entered the toilet in a dim bed light, a dripping tap was enough to trigger the frustration of living in an aging house, a surge of negativity was so severe that everything looked so bleak. In semi-darkness when I bend down to check the leaky tap I forget that stroke doesn’t allow me to bend down and that too in little darkness!! Don’t ask what happened after this but somehow I managed to get back to bed in one piece but trying to set the quilt, badly hurt my frozen shoulder.
The genie of negativity made me lose my rational thinking:
The result of all this shemozzle gave me a reason to be angry with my wife 😉!! She was responsible for the uncomfortable bed and the quilt in any case if not anything else. By now the genie of negativity fully convinced me that my wife was the prime culprit for all that was going wrong in my life. In the spur of the growing frustration I found her to be the perfect scapegoat, a typical outcome of negativity surrounding me from all around; perhaps, first time in the last 3 years but O my God it was a strong feeling.
Feeling guilty can always help to correct our follies:
In the morning I was fed-up with everything, leaky tap, poor bed, O my God I was seriously into a spell of killing self-pity. To cut the story short next day when I rang up one of my very close friends Tahir Shabbir from my college days he was completely shocked to hear all kinds of cribbing and complaints about almost everything and everyone. When he heard all kinds of bizarre nonsense from me even about my wife he perhaps couldn’t believe me and sheepishly requested to be excused for the moment to carry on with some pending errand.
This abrupt ending on the part of my beloved friend further shook me but this time for my good, it made me realize that he perhaps never expected this irrational behavior from me. This shock helped me get out of my frustrating spell and all my anger, complaints, etc. especially against my wife, turned into a deeply felt embarrassment. All my negative feelings were replaced with utter ignominy. I was not angry anymore, all vexation and chagrin completely died away like foam into a deep feeling of shame.
This friend of mine is a winner against many challenges in life besides the monster of loneliness. He has been living alone for the last 35 years; one could call him a freak Nelson Mandela for living many more years in his self-imposed solitary confinement compared to Mr. Mandela and today helped me out of a state of deep anxiety before it could grow to dangerous limits.
Today as I am checking my past work after 1 ½ years to be put on my blog this man has become a cancer survivor as well.
As he put down the phone I started converting tons of negative energy into positive lessons from this creepy experience of my life. I was feeling small for disturbing my friend already trying to befriend the devil of anxiety. This realization made me all the more remorseful.
Retrieving oneself from the quagmire of anxiety is always POSSIBLE;
When I started an autopsy of this creepy incident about how some minor events gradually developed into this precarious situation, I relaxed. I thanked my stars for being rescued from this attack of ANXIETY before it could turn into a Mental Illness. The first light in these dark clouds was the realization of a Big Blessing in disguise; For the first time in the last 3 years, I got a solid reward of consistent Mental Training for developing a firm control over Emotional Stability, making me stronger to live in this world full of multifarious challenges.
An example of how one learns through journaling ;
This might be interesting as well as surprising for my readers that this term Emotional Stability was a gift I got for my sincere endeavors to learn and share my humble experience for the benefit of OTHERS. I and my friends on this humble forum are attaining real HOPE as it simply means (H) helping (O) other (P) people (E) evolve for us. I was looking for appropriate words to express my recent encounter with the devil of anxiety and during my first notes I used the following words to express myself;…..How consistent Mental Training developed strong control over/emotional strengths/emotional surge etc. making us stronger to live in this world full of multifarious challenges…..But now as I was putting it to fair I decided to use the words emotional stability and when I searched Google for the correct use of these words I came to know it is a proper term of psychology meaning exactly what I wanted to convey here.
Neuroticism / Emotional stability
….. Emotional stability refers to a person’s ability to remain stable and balanced. At the other end of the scale, a person who is high in neuroticism has a tendency to easily experience negative emotions
With love to my beloved friends ❤
Conceived on 30 Jan 2022
—————–Writing on the Picture—————–
stitch in time…..
before minor hiccups accumulate
into big hazards like
ANXIETY
Recovery from all agonies even paralysis 